Free How Will You Measure Your Life? Book Summary by Clayton M. Christensen

What You’ll Learn

• Why incentives like more money or a more prestigious title are not the keys to happiness and job satisfaction 
• How to use both deliberate and emergent strategies to capitalize on all possible opportunities
• Why investing in strong relationships is the key to long-term happiness

Who Is This For

• Individuals hoping to find a career where they will be challenged, motivated, and satisfied in the long term
• People who wish to cultivate and nurture stronger, more rewarding personal relationships
• Individuals striving to achieve happiness through a healthy balance of personal and professional accomplishments

Key Insights

Many people assume that when they achieve professional success and have high-profile careers, they will finally be happy. However, lots of people are professionally successful, but still unhappy in their personal lives and struggling with their relationships. Some go through divorces, aren’t close with their children, and some even end up in prison. This is because they do not apply the same theories that enabled them to be successful in business to their personal lives. 

Like businesses, individuals must have a clearly defined strategy for success, and be able to capitalize on opportunities as they arise. In order to develop a successful strategy, individuals should embrace self-awareness, and ask themselves what really interests and motivates them. External incentives, such as a high salary, are often not enough to make a job satisfying in the long-term. To be happy, people must also strive for a good work-life balance. Rather than investing all their time and resources in their career, they should take the time to invest in building strong personal relationships, being a good spouse, raising their children well, and cultivating a strong sense of family values. These long-term goals will be much more rewarding and impactful in the future than short-term goals, such as completing a work project or getting a bonus. Additionally, individuals must never compromise on their integrity. One must always make moral decisions, and never fall into the trap of allowing an unethical action to slide “just this once.”

Motivation Is More Important Than Money 

Most people believe that things like a better salary or more prestige at work would make them happier. These beliefs are so commonplace that they have a name: the incentive theory. This theory was made popular by the economist Michael Jensen and management theorist William Meckling, and it states simply that the more money and respect - that is, external incentives - people receive at work, the better their performance will be. However, these kinds of incentives are not actually the key to happiness, and this theory has proven to be far too simplistic to hold up in real life.

It is true, however, that many people who have achieved professional success will still wind up unhappy in their personal life, struggling with their businesses, or even find themselves caught up in criminal behavior. So clearly professional incentives are not the solution to everything. In fact, studies have shown that the employees that work the hardest are not the highest-paid business executives, but people who are employed at nongovernmental organizations, who are paid far less but whose work has a valuable, far-reaching positive impact on the world. People are much more motivated when they are interested in and receive personal satisfaction from their work, rather than when they receive simple external incentives. 

According to the psychologist Frederick Herzberg, who developed the hygiene-motivation theory, most people’s needs and interests can be divided into hygiene factors or motivation factors, and both are important for job satisfaction. Hygiene factors are basic work conditions, such as job security or company policies, that must be met in order to achieve basic job satisfaction. For example, if someone worked a job they loved, but had no room for advancement in their career, they would ultimately be dissatisfied with their job. Motivation factors are the parts of a job that concern personal growth and motivation, such as the ability to advance, take on more responsibilities, pursue rewarding challenges, and earn recognition for hard work. These factors are usually set by management, which is why, even if someone enjoys their work, poor management will almost always inevitably lead to job dissatisfaction.

Developing A Career Strategy 

Many people have a vague idea of how they would like their career to grow, but few have a clear strategy for how to get there. Developing a clear career strategy is essential to achieving professional goals. There are two different types of career strategies: deliberate strategies and emergent strategies. These strategies develop from the two different ways in which opportunities arise: anticipated opportunities and unanticipated opportunities. 

Anticipated opportunities are the ones that people can see coming, acknowledge, and actively choose to pursue. These are the opportunities upon which people built their deliberate strategies. However, just because a strategy is deliberate, that doesn’t mean it will be successful. For example, when the Japanese car manufacturer Honda wanted to break into the United States’ big motorbike market in the 1960s, they decided to launch their own brand of large motorbikes in the States. However, Honda’s motorbikes were of extremely low quality, so not only did they not take off in the U.S., they did significant damage to Honda’s bottom line. Despite their careful planning, Honda still wasn’t successful.

Unanticipated opportunities, which are opportunities that have not been actively planned for, can be capitalized on by using an emergent strategy. Emergent strategies often come about after a deliberate strategy has been implemented, but needs to be adjusted to adapt to the real-world problems it encounters, and can sometimes even emerge by accident. For example, Honda had failed to break into America’s big motorbike market, but they had also shipped their smaller, Super Club motorbikes to the United States for their Los Angeles employees to use. But when people saw these new, smaller bikes, they became interested and wanted to purchase one for themselves. Honda utilized its emergent strategy by capitalizing on this new interest in smaller motorbikes, which helped them become successful in the United States. The most successful people are able to find a balance of both deliberate and emergent strategies, and utilize both to help ensure they are ready for any opportunity that might come their way.

Allocate Resources According To Both Personal and Professional Goals 

There are many different kinds of resources. People have professional resources, which include things like financial assets, talents, and professional skills. However, people also have personal resources, which are things like time, energy, and health, and they must be mindful of where and how they are investing all of these resources. For example, people should consider what they truly find valuable, such as strong relationships and physical health, and make sure to invest their many resources in these parts of their life, as well as in their businesses.

All resources are finite. Therefore, in order to properly allocate resources, individuals must assess their priorities. Many people fall into the trap of investing all of their resources into their careers while leaving little time and energy left for their personal lives. However, this can be avoided by taking control of the resource allocation process, rather than simply defaulting to investing the bulk of one’s resources into one's work. 

Many people become caught up in automatically allocating all their energy to work, because they are always pursuing some short-term goals, such as the completion of a work project, a promotion, or a financial bonus. However, these short-term goals are often not the most important or the most rewarding aspects of one’s life. People should be careful not to prioritize these short-term goals over the ultimately more important long-term goals, and should take care to allocate their resources according to their true priorities. Valuable personal goals, such as a strong relationship with one’s children or a healthy marriage, will provide a much greater long-term effect on one’s life and will be ultimately far more rewarding.

Strong Relationships Lead To True Happiness 

Many high achievers put the bulk of their effort into their work because they believe it is the most important aspect of their life. However, this is not necessarily the case. Strong personal relationships like a close-knit family and close friendships will be the most rewarding in the long term if they are properly nurtured. People should make it a point to invest in these long-term relationships, in order to reap their full rewards in the future.

For personal relationships to grow, one needs to invest time, attention, and care into them. However, this is often difficult to do in most people’s day-to-day lives. Most people fall into the trap of investing most of their time and resources into the tasks that have the most immediate demands and the most immediate payoff, such as their job. Jobs are constantly making immediate demands, and the payoff of making more money will often cause more people to spend extra time at the office instead of investing it with their family and friends.

Additionally, the closer the relationship is, the less likely these people are to clamor for more time and attention. Close family members and friends are often on hand to give support, and do not complain if they are neglected in favor of job responsibilities. However, even if they do not demand it, these relationships still need to be nurtured and invested in. Many people fall into the trap of thinking they can put these relationships on hold, and make it up to their friends, spouse, or children later, once they have completed a project or advanced in their career. However, relationships cannot be put on hold, and damage will be done if family relationships are not sufficiently invested in. For example, studies show that the most formative time in a child’s development is during their first year of life. This time will never be made up, and the way parents interact with their child and the relationship they develop with them during this time will affect their child’s entire life. Finally, if an individual does not invest time in their family when they can, they cannot expect their family to care for and support them later on, when they might need it most.

To avoid falling into this trap, individuals should take the time to understand and fulfill the needs of their relationships. Much like a job, people should think of relationships in terms of considering how they can best meet the other person’s needs. To do this, they need to utilize intuition and practice empathy.

The strongest marriages utilize both intuition and empathy to help both people understand what their partner needs from them, and how they can best provide it. To be successful, people must keep in mind how they can best complete the jobs their spouses need them to complete. For example, imagine a couple where the man works outside the home and the woman stays home taking care of their two children and caring for the house. One day, the man comes home to find the kitchen a mess, so he decides to clean it. However, his wife is angry, because she did not want the kitchen cleaned. What she really needed from her husband was some adult human interaction after a full day alone with two small children. In this instance, she did not really need help cleaning the kitchen. What she needed was her husband to engage her in conversation and listen to her. The man’s intuition was off, but, by using empathy, he will be able to be more aware of his wife’s needs in the future.

Children Are The Most Important Investment 

One of the most important investments an individual can make is investing in raising and educating their children right. This will have long lasting implications in their lives and for their whole family. Children should not simply be taught what to do, but also need to learn how they can teach themselves things they do not know and to act in accordance with their own values. The best way for children to learn this is by letting them face challenges and deal with problems on their own, without immediately stepping in to fix the problems for them. When children are empowered to solve their own problems, their self-esteem will grow and they will feel more confident and capable.

It can be difficult for parents to allow their children to go out on their own and to make mistakes. Often, parents just want to protect their kids and shield them from failure. However, a parent’s role is not to shield their kids from all adversity, but to support them when they fail, and encourage them to keep trying and to learn from their mistakes.

To be a successful parent, one must also have a healthy family culture with strong family values. Values are a system of guidelines that children can follow when they encounter challenges. A family culture that instills strong values will help their children make correct decisions, even without parental input. Children also learn best by example. So, to cultivate a value, it is important to act in accordance with this value, and praise children when they demonstrate this value on their own. For example, to cultivate kindness, parents should emphasize its importance and praise their children when they show kindness to others. Being an effective parent means not just correcting children when they do something wrong, but in celebrating and promoting good behavior as well.

Never Compromise On Integrity 

Integrity should never be compromised. It is essential, not just in big moral situations, but in day-to-day decision making. Often, many people fall prey to the trap of marginal thinking, which is when they justify doing something that they know is wrong “just this once.” To avoid this, people must remain self-aware.

Marginal thinking can harm businesses as well as people. For example, when the start-up Netflix first launched their online movie rentals, Blockbuster did not want to pay the marginal costs it would have taken to expand its business strategy and include mail-in DVD rentals. As a result, Netflix’s innovative new business model took over, and Blockbuster ended up declaring bankruptcy. This was the result of poor management prioritizing marginal costs at the expense of the overall success of the company.

Similarly, when people are making moral decisions, they must strongly consider every possible outcome. They must maintain integrity, and not fall prey to letting their morals slide “just this once.” For example, a stock trader named Nick Leeson decided to make an exception and hide a loss on a trade he made in an unmonitored trading account. However, this exception snowballed, and soon he was committing even more fraudulent acts, such as forging documents. In the end, he lost $1.3 million dollars, the company declared bankruptcy, and Leeson himself went to jail, all because he allowed himself to compromise his integrity “just this once.”

The Main Take-away

The key to happiness is not necessarily achieving business success, but maintaining a good work-life balance and cultivating strong personal relationships. Applying the same theories that allow people to be successful in business will also help people be successful in their personal lives. They must have a clearly defined strategy for success, pursue careers that motivate and interest them, and invest their resources equally in personal and professional goals. Individuals should invest just as much time in developing a strong relationship with their spouse, educating their children, and creating a culture of strong family values as they do pursue their career goals. Individuals must always act with integrity and never compromise on their values.

About the Author

James Allworth is the head of innovation for Cloudflare, an advisor to Peloton Technology, and the host of the Exponent podcast. His previous writings have appeared in the Harvard Business Review, Bloomberg, Business Insider, and Reuters. He holds an MBA from Harvard Business School.

Karen Dillon is an author, journalist, and keynote speaker. She is the contributing editor to the Harvard Business Review and serves as the editorial director of BanyanGlobal Family Business Advisors. Formerly, she served as the deputy editor of Inc magazine and was the editor and publisher of American Lawyer and Legal Business. She holds a degree from Northwestern University's Medill School of Journalism.

Clayton M. Christensen was an academic, business consultant, and author. He co-founded the venture capital firm Rose Park Advisors, and the management consulting firm Innosight. He served as the Kim B. Clark Professor of Business Administration at the Harvard Business School and was a former Rhodes Scholar.