The Science of Kissing Book Summary

The Science of Kissing Book Summary Preview

Key Insights

When we experience our first romantic kiss, most likely as a teenager or a young adult, the specific mechanics of our happily locking lips are unlikely to be at the forefront of our minds. Instead, we are probably focusing on the new sensations we are encountering and the romantic feelings that are starting to emerge.

But, what if we knew more about what was really happening when we kissed another person? Would a better understanding of how things were occurring ‘behind the scenes’ lead to higher quality smooches later on? 

Sheril Kirshenbaum, the author of The Science of Kissing, postulates that humans can indeed become more competent kissers if they challenge themselves to learn about the historical foundations of smacking lips. We also must value the physiological purposes and implications of what we-- humans and many other animals alike--feel naturally compelled to experience when we encounter the primal pull of attraction.

Love and Trust

After we are born, we quickly become acclimated to being nursed by our mothers. It is through this initial mother-child bonding that babies become comfortable using their lips. In addition to nursing, babies use their lips for self-soothing activities, such as when they suck their thumbs. Even the act of nursing itself is relaxing for babies and makes them feel loved.

In fact, centuries ago, mothers took the use of lips with their babies a step further, often participating in premastication or the process of feeding mouth-to-mouth. While this might sound gross to contemporary moms, women used to lack the ability to have their babies’ food mashed mechanically, so premastication served as a transitional step between breastfeeding and solid food.

To this day, premastication is employed by many different animals, including apes and birds. In some cultures, it is still a practice that is implemented by humans as well. Premastication not only increases a baby’s attachment to their mother, but it also strengthens a child’s emotional foundation for the kissing that is likely to occur later in life.

A recent study found that in modern Egypt, more than 39 out of 119 communities still utilize premastication, which can also be effective in warding off illness.

Social Purposes

While we most often think of kissing as a precursor to--or a piece of--sexual activity, there are actually social reasons behind it as well.

In the Middle Ages, you would kiss people in different places depending on their social status. For instance, if you were greeting a priest, you would kiss his cloth and if you were greeting the Pope, you would kiss his slippers or ring. When you were kissing the ground, that usually meant that you were greeting a King.

Similar to the way that we use ‘x’s’ to represent kisses when we are typing out messages on a computer, the letter ‘x’ used to be found on contracts so that they could be signed by way of a kiss. Even now, you will often see an x in front of a signature line on most formal documents.

Almost every animal species has a behavior that mirrors kissing,...

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