Free Speak Book Summary by Tunde Oyeneyin

Take-aways:

• Don't wait on others before you start loving yourself.
• Use our gifts for a larger purpose.
• Trust our inner voice.
• Acknowledge and work through doubt.
• Take the detours life throws at us.
• Keep persevering even through the pain.
• Always be prepared for opportunities.
• Speak up and be yourself unapologetically.

Key Insights

Loving ourselves is a mantra easily said but difficult to do. Many struggle with their appearances or their status in life. Others even become very hard on themselves and eventually wear themselves out. However, if we learn to step up to the challenges that arise in our lives and walk towards self-acceptance and self-love, we can live better and purposeful lives.

Tunde Oyeneyin’s Speak offers us stories and events in her life which revolve around the principles of surrender, power, empathy, authenticity, and knowledge—hence the title SPEAK. The book brings us with Oyeneyin as she goes through her journey as she grows mentally, spiritually, physically, and emotionally.

Love and trust yourself.

Tunde Oyeneyin was overweight throughout her child and teenage years. This started when her family migrated from Nigeria to Texas in the 1970s. When their family became comfortable enough, her mother encouraged her and her siblings to eat as this was a good habit. However, at the age of 14, Oyeneyin started experiencing the struggles which came with being overweight. She couldn’t fit in bridesmaid dress and started realizing that she didn’t fit the conventional standards of society. Because of this, she started minimizing her social footprint and tried to make herself small. This was when she realized that she was not loving herself enough to show her authentic self. Seeing her attitude, her mother realized how Oyeneyin was changing and encouraged her to start her weight loss journey. She eventually lost 70lbs. She became healthily and found the importance of loving yourself enough to take care of herself.

Another way to love ourselves, according to Oyeneyin is to find our gifts, hone them, and use them to make our society a better place. Some people are talented cooks so they give away food packages. Others are gifted in singing, so other singers host benefit concerts for their chosen charities. However, it doesn’t always have to be something big and extravagant. For Oyeneyin, her talent was making those around her feel uplifted and beautiful.

She realized this when she was working various jobs during college and became a make-up demonstrator for customers. While doing their make-up she listened to their stories and started bringing in energy to their interactions which they responded to positively. Once she found out her gift and purpose, she started letting herself grow in the make-up industry. It even came to a point that she decided to leave Houston and everything she knew to go to Los Angeles. She trusted herself enough to take the risk.

This brings us to another point made by Oyeneyin in the journey of loving ourselves: trust our inner voice. Although Oyeneyin went to various lengths to pursue make-up, she found herself feeling uninspired in conducting makeup demonstrations. She felt that it was becoming repetitive and that she also had to leave to move on from her younger brother’s untimely death. She decided to trust what she was feeling and started attending a stationary bike class. Oyeneyin went on to state that we should “Acknowledge logic, but turn up the volume on the voice that believes in you. Trusting your gut is choosing to lean toward the voice that propels you forward."

Once we learn to love ourselves and trust our instincts enough to take big risks in life and move towards change, we can start feeling and seeing positive changes in ourselves.

Keep moving towards our course of action.

A lot of inspirational writers and speakers push their audience away from doubt. But for Oyeneyin, she encourages her readers to acknowledge doubt. Not to absorb or to embrace doubt, but to realize that we have doubt and to work on what we are doubting. We shouldn’t hide from doubt but to act on what’s creating doubt in our lives. This is where Oyeneyin starts highlighting that we need to change and act so that opportunities can open the door and walk right in. Remember that inner voice Oyeneyin taught us to trust? Well, that inner voice will lead us towards our dreams and goals. But to do that, we must move and take action.

The path towards our goals isn’t always straight forward. Life doesn’t really give us a map and directions on where to go to reach our goals. As Oyeneyin started participating in local cycling classes, soon enough, she became a part-time instructor. She then received a message from the cycling director at Peleton inviting her to audition. Set on getting the part and knowing that she was exceptional at the audition, Oyeneyin was sure that she would get the part. But it never came. This was a blow to Oyeneyin and brought in low self-confidence to her at the time. Eventually, Oyeneyin learned to accept that her plan didn’t work and that maybe it just wasn’t for her. Afterwards, she went right back on her feet and dedicated her time to training more people as a cycling instructor. This goes to show that life won’t always go as we plan, but how we react to certain detours is what’s important in reaching our goal.

To keep moving towards our goals, Oyeneyin also reminds her readers that plans won’t always work out. Additionally, that unfulfilled plans aren’t equal to failure. She encourages her readers to let go of a defeatist attitude and to become open to alternative paths instead. Refusing change and deeming detours as failures will not help us grow. According to Oyeneyin, a “goal is a wish, but a standard holds you accountable." This means that we should prioritize establishing a course of action instead of an end result. For instance, we should commit to run instead of reaching a certain point or running at a certain pace. This would make us accountable and push us to actually run. By becoming open—and even planning for —to detours, delays, and various stumbles, we allow our minds space to accept change.

Another way to keep going towards our course of action is to persevere. Even when it’s painful or even when it seems impossible, we must persevere. Oyeneyin recounted when her father died, and she had to deliver a eulogy. She was in tremendous pain, but she persevered and delivered her speech. A couple of years later, her mother died of ovarian cancer. At the age of 29, Oyeneyin had lost three of her family members. But despite this, she became resilient and kept standing up and pressing towards her goal.

Additionally, Oyeneyin tells her readers to always be prepared and the opportunity will eventually come through the door. Through the years, Oyeneyin still kept her cycling classes. Suddenly, Peloton called and inquired if she was still interested in the position. After auditioning again, Peloton finally offered her the job. The trick here is to keep looking, manifesting, and working towards our vision and this will eventually become a reality.

Once Oyeneyin had reached one of her dreams, she could have just relaxed and do her own thing. But, Oyeneyin realized that her gift of speech is something that she can use for a larger cause. After the George Floyd case last May 2020 wherein a black man was killed by a police officer, Oyeneyin decided to finally speak up and show her stance in social media. This was after she decided to delete content on her accounts which may be considered controversial or offending by other clients. After deciding to post the video, Oyeneyin was asked by Peloton to do a special ride for the Black Lives Matter movement. She agreed and did a live “Speak Up” ride where 22,000 people joined her.

The Main Take-away

Accepting ourselves for who we are and navigating through life isn’t the easiest task in the world. But there are people who can help us improve our outlook in life and to eventually love ourselves. Tunde Oyeneyin’s Speak teaches us how to be unapologetically ourselves. In this inspiring memoir, she relives her journey towards who she is right now and tells us the mindset she had in conquering various obstacles in her life.

A motivational, emotional, and inspiring book, Speak teaches its readers how to rise above the challenges and how to navigate through life’s challenges while learning self-awareness, self-acceptance, and self-love. This awe-inspiring book shows its readers that life isn’t always going to be a walk in the park but it also teaches its readers how to react in hard situations and to prepare themselves for success.

About the Author

Tunde Oyeneyin is Texas native who originally came from Nigeria. She is a Peloton instructor who trains more than 20,000 riders at any given day. She is also a well-known motivational speaker. Oyeneyin began her career as a professional makeup artist and eventually became a fitness instructor. She has been featured in Today, Good Morning America, Vogue, and many more. In 2021, she was named a Nike Athlete and the face of Revlon.